Saturday, August 8, 2009
5:20 PM
I envy people who can express their feelings freely, be it face to face or in the net. I like reading posts on how they spend their time with their love ones, how they express their sad or happy feelings. And I will become a fool smiling by myself and envy them secretly.
I know people will be saying I can do the same too. Yes I wish I can but my protective thinking is always stopping me from doing all these things. I know I'm thinking too much but I cant stop thinking.
But right now, I decided to release out part of them.
I dont know why the feeling is on and off.
When its on, I couldnt stop missing the days we spent together.
The smile, the laughter and everything.
Every lil things You do, affects me alot.
I hate it when You do not know how I Feel whenever You are with me.
I hate myself, hate my everything...
I'm tired of everything..
expressing the emptiness inside me..
4:29 PM
these few days i have been heading to NTU for English test, for Welcome Ceremony and for purchasing lecture notes. its very tiring to keep travelling to Boon Lay when i'm staying in Yishun. i began to get sick and tired of NTU when i have not even started studying. Weird right? the first time i have this kind of feeling towards my second home.
The coming week marks the first week of my Uni Life. No more slacking but sweating and stressing all the way through.. Just hoping that I pass my English Test so that i can have one less module to struggle. why do i continued with Engineering course when i have no interest at all is that I study for the sake of studying, for the sake of my mother, for the sake of my future and for the sake that I cant study what i want initially. So this is my chosen path no other way out. just hope that i can struggle my way out smoothly.
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Thursday, July 30, 2009
8:59 PM
Last Wednesday went to watch Harry Potter and The Half Blood Prince with Liying. After that headed down to Bugis. then dine in @ Swenson. i just realised i always go to Swenson and eat...haha like a regular customer sia...
Last Friday went to NTU to have my medical checkup. Its not that i want to go NTU and do it, but I've got no choice, cos even if i did my check-up at other places, i still have to travel down to NTU and submit my medical report. Once i reach there, I thought i could make use of the map they mailed to me. But sad to say i don have any sense of direction, so i jus ask around for directions. i cant believe the level i step once i got out of the bus was Level B4!!! wat shit sia...and the place i'm going is @ Level B2.
Many things happened last weekend. I really hate to know bout this for 3 times in my whole lifetime. 16 yrs ago, 3 yrs ago and right now. the bad history is haunting me non-stop, it jus never disappear. Sometimes i asked myself why mus i always find out all these bad things, right now i'm thinking mayb i brought these all to myself. ya mayb i asked for it. my hidden scar will never diminished, it will always got dug out and ripped apart leaving the blooding flowing endlessly. how i wish i can die right now...
Can i end my life right now??
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Thursday, June 4, 2009
8:17 PM
2nd June
brought my mum to swenson for lunch, since there is the 1 for 1 lunch treat promotion. went to the money changer and change my japan money back to sing dollar at the same time change Korea Won too...lol i change $500 and they gave me 42 pieces of 10 000 Won notes...so thick la...
4th June
went to run an errand for my dad, change the StarHub Analogue Set-top box into a digital one for free due to cessation of analogue transmission. then one of my best buddy called me out for a movie. haha so random...anyway he drove me around so i don need to bother much plus these days the weather isnt good too. We watch Night At The Musemum 2, my neck almost cant look down due to the near seating to the screen.
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Monday, May 25, 2009
1:28 PM
who the hell u tink u r?? u tink u're the president's son??? u tink u're a rich guy's son?? TO HELL U GO!!! U'RE WORST THAN A RUBBISH BIN!!!
Once i got back home frm my lesson, what kind of comment is that?? who do u tink u are to comment bout me??? u aint my brother neither my dad too... WHO THE HELL R U!!!! U'RE STILL A OUTSIDER !!!! CHEE BYE!!! WHAT DO U MEANT BY THOSE THAT GOT LESSER DEMERIT POINTS IN DRIVING TEST WILL MAKE MORE MISTAKE AND U LOOK DOWN ON THEM EVEN MORE!!!! U FUCKER DID I EVEN IRRITATE U IN THE FIRST PLACE??? WHO R U TO MAKE TIS COMMENT BOUT ME??? y dont u jus say that u're jealous that u need to fail twice before passing ur driving test?? LOSER!!!
my dad is jus kind enough to bought breakfast for u, u didnt even said thank you and jus refused to eat it..fine its ok...i tolerate...my mum cut a red apple for u, without tasting u jus said how come its green apple n not red apple...u got no tongue to taste izzit, its a red apple jus that the flesh is abit of greenish...who the hell r u to comment so much!!!! again my kind mother was kind enough to offer u an orange.. guess what tis bastard said: huh i dont eat ORANGES!!!! don u know the basic manner of accepting rather than keep commenting and rejecting!!! i guess ur parents jus didnt teach u manners!!! i cant believe such a person had already came out of army!!! he should be imprison in army forever!!! fucking idiotic asshole!!!
next who r u to use my things without my permission??? u're jus a guest that doesnt give u permission to touch my things..
tis will be the last time i'm toleratng ur nonsense...next time round u better watch out!!!!
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Monday, May 18, 2009
6:16 PM
once again i'm dumping my blog aside...
well i've been doing nth during the holidays except slacking at home plus a few outings wif fren...recently jus so many things had happened...all of a sudden my grandmother just passed away due to congestive heart failure. right now is the 2nd day after her body has been burnt. hopefully my life had start afresh.
ytd went out with Wendy Laura Hui Hoon and Zhen Rong. intial plan was to go Bugis but end up we went to City Hall and shop around Marina Sq n Suntec. to me its doesnt seems like shooping, its like some sort of meet up with fren after such a long vacation had passed. cos we met up at 2pm and i was alte for bout 25 mins, then we started having lunch at Pasta de Waraku. started walking at 4.30pm all of them were tired, so they doesnt have the strength to shop. i was the only hyper one that wanted to shop but the mood isnt there cos of the surrounding. Well, just anyhow window shop.
since they were tired, we settle down at Gelaire and chit chat drink coffee. Ok i'm mus confess that i'm the only one drinking coffee. chat a few funny and sad stuffs...trying to dig some secrets n some memories. haha...that is all for yesterday. Boring right...haha...
Suddenly i got this urge in looking forward to Wed's Graduation Ceremony. Can meet up with frens, celebrate graduation after the ceremony but still dono the plans yet...
p.s : hope can enjoy all the way without any constraints...
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Saturday, March 21, 2009
12:11 PM
我越来越不能理解她了！！！
ever since she stop working and stay at home, she have been such a nuisance to me... all the matter in my life she will always wan to interfere, asking me this and that, blaming me wif all sorts of possible reasons that she can came out of... what exactly is wrong with her???
my hp rings, she also wan to know who is it. i know its nth wrong telling her who is it, but in the previous incident, i told her who is it, she will continue to ask why she look for u, how is she doing what is her results...all sorts of qsn she can tink of...its damn irritating to ans her qsns... tis time round she heard my hp rings so many times, she started to ask me who called me, but actually its jus message ringtone. i told her nobody called me, u know what she kept saying but jus nw i heard ur phone rang quite a few times. i continue to shake my head, she still insist that its someone calling me. OMFG!!!!! i choose nt to tell her its message ringtone, cos i knw the next moment she will ask me who is it...i don wan her to interfere so much and bother me loads of qsn...then she started to bring up the past matters, something like settling the past scores with me. WTF la...always like that, i told her off and she is pissed off right now that she don wanna tell me what she is cooking for lunch. fuck man!!!
fucking irritated by her nonsense...till now i didnt went to look for job and she is constantly nagging at me for nt looking for a job. seriously she is getting on my nerves recently!!!! my sis's prob she will always ask me, my sis irritate her she will nag to me as if this nag will solve all the problem!!! what the hell is wrong with her brain??
not only is she interfering my life, her new pattern is to arrange some talk regarding some health products without asking me and telling me that she already fixed a time for me to go!!! WTF i'm nt an artiste, u aint my manager too!!! stop this kind of irritating acts!!!!
expressing the emptiness inside me..
